When I was in New York City a few weeks ago (see my previous blog post here about the trip), I was honored to spend time on The Breakfast Club with Charlamagne Tha God and DJ Envy. This was actually my second time on The Breakfast Club, with the first time being on Zoom because of the pandemic. So, it was pretty awesome to be in the building and sitting at the same table with them for the interview.
Charlamagne Tha God, Corey Minor Smith, and DJ Envy at the Breakfast Club in New York, NY!
For those who aren’t familiar, Charlamagne Tha God is the co-host of The Breakfast Club, a nationally syndicated hip-hop iHeartRadio program. He’s also a New York Times Bestselling Author, social media influencer, executive producer with his own production company, co-host of a podcast called Brilliant Idiots, and host of Comedy Central’s late night show Tha
God’s Honest Truth.
Yes. He’s the REAL DEAL.
And he and Envy aren’t afraid to talk about the hard things, which is why we had such a good conversation.
For a little over 30 minutes, I talked to Charlamagne and DJ Envy about dealing with my mother’s severe mental illness, what makes relationships healthy and dealing with trauma in life. And, Angela Yee was not out of the loop. She quoted me and shared a clip of the interview on her personal Facebook
But if you don’t have 30 minutes to spare right now, here are three big takeaways from the interview:
We talked about how I was around 13 years old and my mother had a manic episode so bad, we had to take her to the Emergency Room. Up until then, I would have just described my mom’s behavior as ‘weird’. But it took that trip to the ER to get her diagnosed with manic depression (now known as Bipolar Disorder), paranoid schizophrenia. Takeaway: Don’t wait until a crisis to see a doctor. When you or a loved one get a yearly physical checkup, be sure to get a mental health checkup too. Not that anything is wrong then, but don’t wait until something is wrong.
Mental health issues impact family members. We can talk about self-care all day long, but people who have severe mental illness lack insight to even know they are sick. So, family members must implement self-care and boundaries for themselves. For me, it looks like helping my mom out whenever I am able, and I can be directly involved in her care. But if my mom is in a bad space and I don’t know how she is going to receive me, I communicate through her treatment team, such as her medical providers, case workers and anyone else who is part of the wraparound services. Takeaway: Be involved in your loved one’s treatment team and have the numbers and names ready at any time when you need the support.
I was asked for advice about how women should deal with men who have trauma in their lives – past and current. There’s no shortcut to this: open communication is essential. In order to move forward in a relationship, both people need to be able to explain their feelings and emotions. Going to therapy might be necessary. Healing hurts, but you both must be willing to bear pain to get better. And if something is starting to negatively impact you spiritually, mentally and physical, it’s time to let go. Sometimes it’s a job, sometimes it’s a goal, and sometimes it’s a relationship. Takeaway: Communication and honesty are the keys to keeping relationships real and healthy. Find individuals who can support you and lift you up. Having those people in place can help you through most any situation and especially through trauma. Life is hard. And dealing with severe mental illness on top of that, it’s really hard!
Overall, it was a great conversation and a great morning spent with The Breakfast Club. I’m grateful to The Breakfast Club team for hosting me and having these needed conversations. I loved every moment of my time in New York City and can’t wait to go back again!
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